Yeah, that happened.
But it's not the worst tediously predictable holiday movie this year. That title is reserved for Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas.
Certified dick hole and Jesus gal-pal, Mike Seaver, is fed up with the war on Christmas.
Seriously, Cameron, where is this war on Christmas? As far as I can tell, Christmas began weeks before Halloween. That's more than two months, a rather decent fraction of the entire year.
What more do you want?
Don't get me wrong. I love Christmas. I say Merry Christmas. But in the last few years, by the time December 25th rolls around, I'm so fucking sick of Christmas my single, 38 year old ass is aching for Valentine's Day to slap me in the face.
If anyone's declared war on Christmas, it's Christmas.
So what if cashiers at Macy's say "Happy Holidays"? Their window displays prove that they certainly know what time of year it is. Washington landmarks - the very symbols of this nation - are decked out in the signs of the season.
Well, Kirk Cameron still isn't satisfied. And thank God he's not, because it inspired him to make Saving Christmas, and the most accidental piece of Hollywood humor since the sequel to C.H.U.D. But the movie isn't the funny part. That's all on Cameron himself. With an apparent knowledge of how the internet works akin to his understanding of evolution, Cameron took to Facebook to encourage his fans to boost the movie's abysmal 36% Rotten Tomatoes rating.
After his plea? 8%.
Maybe he should have prayed harder. Or maybe it's because all of those who critiqued his movies are just evil. In Cameron's mind I'm guessing they're Jews and gays.
I swear, there is no bigger ass hole than an ass hole who doesn't know he's an ass hole.
Happy Holidays, Kirk Cameron.
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